If you want to change your drinking habits, AA and total abstinence aren’t your only options. Research from the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism shows that most people who change their drinking habits do so without AA or rehabilitation. Many decide that quitting smoking altogether is their best option, but many, if not more, solve their problems by cutting back or becoming more confident drinkers.
1) Safety first
If you have engaged in unsafe drinking behaviors such as drunk driving, unsafe sex, drunk dialing, or any of many others, there is a way to help you avoid this in the future. Get a piece of paper and make a list of the risky behaviors you have engaged in and rank them in a hierarchy; remember that the most important thing is to avoid the riskiest behaviors first. Then make a written plan to avoid your high-risk behaviors before you take your first drink. For example, if you want to drink at a bar, take a taxi there so you have to take a taxi home. You can’t drive if your car isn’t there. Remember: think before you drink. It’s always a good idea to put safety first. The life you save can be your own.
2) Decide what type of drinker you want to be
Many people find that giving up alcohol completely is their best option. No matter how much or how little you drink, anyone can make the decision to completely abstain from alcohol. Others find that drinking in moderation is their best goal and will choose to have a goal of drinking in moderation and never getting intoxicated. Even those who are unwilling or unable to refrain from drinking to intoxication can sometimes work to become safer drinkers by planning ahead. Safer drinking can be an important harm reduction goal for these people, as any plan to be safer is always an improvement over unsafe drinking. Safer drinking, reduced drinking, or abstinence from alcohol are all legitimate harm reduction goals, and all are better than no change at all. Also remember that your goal is not set in stone: many people who choose safer or reduced drinking goals decide later that switching to abstinence is their best option. Life changes and it is good to be flexible and change with it.
3) Add a few days without drinking
Many people find that having several alcohol-free days a week helps them keep their habit in check. If you’ve been drinking every day for a long time, adding even one day without drinking each week can help you start your switch plan. Feel free to go at your own pace by adding alcohol-free days to your week. Warning: If you have been drinking heavily every day for a long time, you may have alcohol withdrawal if you stop drinking all at once. If you start to have withdrawal symptoms when you stop drinking, then it’s safer to decrease the amount slowly, start a detox, or get some medications from your doctor to help you with alcohol withdrawal.
4) Count and record how much you drink
One of the best ways to monitor your drinking is to count your drinks and keep a daily record on a calendar or some other type of drink chart. To keep an accurate record of how much you drink, you’ll need to learn what a standard drink is. In the US, this is a twelve-ounce five-percent-alcohol beer or a five-ounce glass of twelve-percent-alcohol wine or one-and-a-half ounces of 80-proof alcohol. A drink at a bar can contain up to a half-dozen standard drinks, so be careful about this when registering your drinks. Practice measuring at home to get an idea of how much a standard drink really costs. Write down your drinking numbers on your calendar every day; if you have a day of abstinence, enter a zero. Many people find that the act of charting itself helps them cut back.
5) Make a drinking plan
You can use the same calendar where you record your drink numbers to plan how many drinks you’ll have on a given day. For example, you might want to set aside every Sunday to make your drinking plan for the coming week and write down which days you will be alcohol-free and how many drinks you plan to have on your drinking days. Some people may want to have the same plan every week and will choose to write it down just once. For example, a person may choose to drink safely at home every Saturday night and abstain the other six days of the week. There are as many different possible drinking plans as there are people, so feel free to make the plan that’s right for you.
6) Make a list of pros and cons
Take out four sheets of paper. On the first, write down the pros of your current drinking habits and on the second, write down the cons. On the third, write down the pros of your intended change, and on the fourth, write down the cons. Don’t be afraid to say that alcohol has positive aspects; if you try to suppress the positive aspects, they will stay in your subconscious and cause you problems later on. If you get this out in the open now, you can acknowledge it and find other positive things to replace the benefits you get from alcohol. Feel free to make the list of pros and cons frequently; each time you write them down, you will strengthen your resolve to change.
7) Take a break from drinking
Some people find that the best way to prompt a change in their drinking habits is to have a period without drinking. Taking a week or two or even a month or two without drinking can go a long way in improving your relationship with alcohol. An alcohol-free period of time will give you the opportunity to deal with all your old drinking situations without alcohol, and you’ll learn new ways to deal with these situations without alcohol.
8) Make a list of ways to have fun without drinking
There are limitless ways to have fun without alcohol, from swimming and knitting to the New York Times crossword puzzle. Get out a piece of paper and make a list of fun things you can do without alcohol and keep it handy to refer to when you feel the need to break your drinking plan.
9) Accentuate the positive
Don’t beat yourself up if you don’t stick to your plan perfectly. Research shows that most people don’t get it right the first time. Usually making a change takes several tries and there are some slip-ups along the way to achieve your change goal. If you punish yourself for a small slip, you can feel so miserable that you want to drown your sorrows in alcohol and, as a result, you can end up bingeing. The people who achieve long-term success are the ones who praise themselves for every positive change. If you decide to take a month off from alcohol and make it to ten days, be sure to praise yourself for those ten days of alcohol abstinence, you’ll never miss them. Don’t waste too much time beating yourself up over the fact that you missed the full 30 days, get right back to the plan, whether you decide to finish the remaining 20 days, go for a straight 30 days, or go for a completely new plan.
10) Have a “Plan B” ready
Slips are the norm when people try to change their habits; only the minority make the complete change the first time. But having a piece of chocolate cake doesn’t mean you have to eat the whole cake. A drink doesn’t have to mean a drunk. If you plan to abstain but slip up and decide to have a drink, make sure you do so safely; If you are in your car, take your car home first and take a taxi to the bar. Have your plan B ready so you stay safe even if you slip up. A backup plan is essential whether your goal is to drink more safely, cut back on alcohol, or quit smoking altogether.
Always remember that better is better. Any improvement you make on your old drinking habits, no matter how small, is a success!