When it comes to babies and sleep, everyone will have an opinion for you that is sure to be the answer to your sleepless nights. This is one of those times when you will have to be firm and make your own decisions about what kind of sleep routine and schedule you are going to have. There are baby experts who will tell you that you should never let your baby cry while you are trying to fall asleep. The next expert will tell you that she should never give in to her baby’s crying once she’s put him to bed. Which method is correct and which is wrong? It all depends on your needs and the needs of your baby. The sleep guidelines in this chapter are just that: a variety of tips and ideas that you may or may not try to incorporate into her bedtime routine.
Before making the decision about what to do with that baby who doesn’t want to sleep is where that baby sleeps. Some parents insist that their baby sleep in her own crib in her own room. Still other parents want their baby in her bedroom. Neither is right or wrong and both have advantages. If your baby sleeps in her room, you’ll likely get more rest, since you won’t be disturbed by the snorting and other sleepy noises that newborn babies make. Your baby may wake up less often if she’s in her own room, but that’s not always the case. If your baby is sleeping in the same room as you, you may find it less disruptive and easier to attend to your baby’s needs right there. If you not only have your baby in the same room as you, but also in the same bed, you should be aware of some of the dangers of sleeping together in the same bed. Baby experts are completely divided on the issue of sharing the same bed with your baby. You will need to investigate safety in the face of emotional problems and decide for yourself whether to take your baby to bed with you.
You may need more sleep than your new baby. Most of the time, newborn babies cannot sleep through the night until they have at least doubled their weight. This usually happens when your baby is four to five months old. The following table shows the amount of sleep that babies should sleep. Keep in mind that this is just a guide and don’t be discouraged if your baby doesn’t fit the norm.
Age…………Total hours of sleep needed per day (including naps)
1-15 days……….16-22
3 weeks……….16-18
6 weeks………..15-16
4-6 months …….. 14-16
9 months………..13-16
1 year…………12-15
Once you’ve decided how you’ll manage where your baby sleeps and the amount of sleep the charts indicate she should be getting, you’ll want to think about establishing some sort of routine, regardless of whether or not she’s going to sleep better, because of it. or not. A sleep routine can be a relaxing and comforting part of your baby’s nighttime ritual. It’s a way for you and your family to incorporate sleep into your daily routine without turning it into a mental battle for the baby. As your baby gets older, he’ll understand that bedtime comes after bath time and can begin to settle down if the bedtime routine comforts him.
There are many ways to establish a bedtime routine. Here are some tips and ideas for bedtime routines you may want to consider:
1. Start the bedtime routine with a bath, cuddle time, a song or story, a feeding, more cuddles, and then off to bed.
2. Sing a soothing lullaby just before putting your baby to bed.
3. Try to do things in the same order, with the same people involved, at the same time each night to create a pattern your baby will recognize as a bedtime routine.
4. Make sure the lights are low and dim You want your baby to recognize that when it’s dark, it’s time to sleep.
5. Make sure that any routine you establish for yourself and your baby has a purpose in the end. Your baby should learn that when she puts him to bed, no matter how nice the bedtime routine was, it’s time to sleep. Give him some time to complain.
Number five on the list above is a very important point to remember when trying to establish your bedtime routine. Whether you hold your baby, lie down with him or sing to him one more time after putting him to bed, you’ll expect that anytime he’s not ready for sleep, all you have to do is fuss and delight. if rocked, it will be yours again. You’re not trying to play a control game with him or deny him your affection after you’ve put him to bed. After all, it’s normal for him to want to be with you. What he’s trying to do is make her understand that once the bedtime routine is complete, it’s time to sleep.
A quick note on night feedings, which will be discussed later in the chapter entitled From Milk to Solids. If you’re feeding your baby at night, you won’t be able to establish that bedtime routine. If your baby needs to feed at night, she may need to delay a good sleep pattern until he is ready to stop feeding at night.
Most babies stop nursing at night around five or six months.
Lullabies. Still on the subject of sleep, but on the more entertaining side: Lullabies. Using music to lull and lull your baby to sleep can be a pleasant experience for both of you. More on music in the next chapter titled Using Music to Calm Your Baby.
The lullaby, or lullaby, has been around for centuries. Whether you’re singing Brahm’s lullaby or stumbling across a Sesame Street tune, what matters is that you’re using the power of music and your voice to communicate with your baby. Singing a lullaby at some point in your baby’s nighttime routine will soothe him and prepare him for the stillness of sleep.
There is much more that can be covered under the topic of “sleep” when it comes to your baby. You will have to establish your own nightly rules by trial and error. As your baby gets older, you will notice that her sleep patterns are constantly changing. What you will have established with the use of baths and lullabies are certain characteristics that can be adapted to any nightly routine that you propose to suit the age and needs of your baby. With lots of patience and love, you’ll be able to navigate the ever-changing world of baby sleep.