Your ex boyfriend wants to talk to you! You’ve been looking forward to this day since the breakup. He was and is the man of your dreams and when the relationship ended, your heart felt like it went with him. You were devastated and depressed. Being without him was pure torture and it didn’t get much easier as time went by. Now, out of the blue, he tells you that he would like to talk about things. You are giddy with excitement and you are already planning your romantic meeting. Before you start choosing names for your future children, you need to slow down. How you handle this conversation will actually be critical to getting him to come back.
If your ex boyfriend wants to talk to you, don’t jump to the conclusion that it’s about getting back together. There are many reasons for an ex to want to talk. Some examples are that he may want to get some things back that he left at your house, he may be moving to another place, or he just wants to tell you that he has found someone else. You can usually tell if it’s any of the above by subtle clues in conversations or correspondence you’ve already shared. If he mentions that he misses you or wishes things were different, then it’s reasonably safe to assume that he’ll want to talk about getting back together.
You need to let him take the lead in the conversation. Listen carefully to what he says and take time to process it before you react. If he says that he’s been thinking a lot and that he wants to try to be friends, don’t dismiss it. If you say you expected more, he will feel pressured and he may back off again. You have to give yourself time to absorb the conversation and you shouldn’t seem desperate. Doing that will really impact his attraction and his desire to be with you.
The best thing to do after you talk is to tell him that you need time to think. This shows her that you’re not looking forward to being her girlfriend again. That’s important as it suggests to him that you’re a bit on the fence about things. This will make him work harder to make you want to get back together, and it will ensure that your needs in the relationship are more important to him. If you take it easy and appear to be relaxed and in emotional control, it will actually make him want to work harder to win your love back.